Lately I have been thinking a lot about taking chances. We take chances every day. A chance might be taken when applying for a job or a school. Someone might take a chance when reaching out to someone they care about. Others might take a chance when competing for an award.
As someone who believes that the so-called chances are actually orchestrated into a plan for our lives, I have been thinking about what it means to reach out and try. As many of you know, I have decided to take my education in a different direction. As I have become increasingly interested in advocacy and policy issues, I have decided to apply to law school. This is a huge chance to take. Am I smart enough? Am I strong enough? Do I have enough money? Do I fit the lawyer personality? Can I do this?
Questions and chances must go together. But I am more interested in how all of these questions and chances that we have all fit together as pieces of getting us to where we are supposed to go. I think about my own life. I can recall thinking about law school as a junior in high school. At the time and in the times following, I felt that I was not smart enough and that I didn't have the right personality to do this. Many people discouraged this as a career goal and I listened. But it has been increasingly there on my heart and mind as I consider future careers. Then I think about the journey of getting from that junior in high school who was too scared to commit to being a lawyer or going to law school to now as I study for the LSAT. What has changed?
The thing that has changed is that I have taken chances. I have decided to go out on limbs further than I ever thought I would. But these chances were not all of my own. Chances for me are about faith. Chances are about hearing a whisper and then going for it. I have been blessed with a persistent and determined attitude that pushes me toward finding where I am supposed to be.
I have declined chances and opportunities many times when thinking about law school. I have constantly come up with excuses like not being smart enough, not reading well enough, or not being good enough for this. But God has proved me wrong every time. He has shown me my intellectual abilities, technologies to make reading more efficient, and a passion for serving people with disabilities that overrides all fears.
I would never have planned this for myself. I would have never believed myself to be smart or talented enough to go to law school. On my own, I would have listened to all of the people who discouraged this journey from the start. But instead, I listened to my calling. My calling is to take chances every day.
I take little chances all the time. I take a chance every day when I rely on transportation from the city or the transportation for people with disabilities. I take a chance that I will actually get to where I need to go on time. I take a chance of the bus won't be broken down. I take a chance that the driver will be able to find me. I take a chance that I can actually locate the bus stop.
Then I take chances wherever I'm going. I take a chance that I will be able to physically see my students faces as a substitute teach. I take a chance that I will be able to physically read the LSAT test and be able to understand it when given accommodations. I take a chance that I will be able to make a difference with this new journey. I take a chance that I am truly following my calling.
But chances are not taken without wisdom. They can't be. Someone just taking a chance without any reason is worthless. Chances must be guided. Chances are stepping out and believing that what you're doing is right.
Many people's chances aren't like mine. Many people don't have to wonder about bus stops or reading things. Most people don't have to worry about taking big tests or going to law school. But chances are still important. Will you take a chance? Take a chance to reach a goal. Take a chance to try something new. Take a chance to go to school or change careers. Take a chance at love. Take a chance of forgiveness. Take a chance of reaching out. Take a chance at finding something new. Just do all of these things with wisdom and grace.
This idea of taking chances has led me in my prayers about law school. I have wondered a lot about the finances of law school. I am blessed to end my undergraduate studies with little to no debt. This is not typical. I want to be wise as I think about entering law school. I certainly do not want to be in debt. But at the same time, I have felt my thoughts guided to think about providence.
I have been praying about the finances of law school for a very long time. I am a very practical person. But sometimes this practical nature, although often very useful, can be limiting. Sometimes us practical people miss out on opportunities. We miss out on opportunities to take chances we are meant to take. God has been teaching me a lot about taking chances lately. He has showed me healing in taking chances to reach out to people who have hurt me. At the same time, he has told me a lot about taking chances when I rest in him.
I have had my eyes opened to many discussions in church and community about people who have taken chances while knowing that God was guiding them. My ears have been tuned to hear stories where people have been asked to go and then God provided. Day after day I have been focused on messages of missionaries, pastors, teachers, and other ordinary people who have been called to go somewhere before receiving money to make their journey successful. I have wondered for a long time, why doesn't he just provide from the start? Why do we often have to go in faith before receiving the things we need?
God has taken a chance on me. He takes a chance that I will serve him. He takes a chance that I will trust him. He takes a chance that I will do the right thing. Yes, he knows what I will do before I do it, but he still takes a chance on me. See if chance is faith, then God has faith in me. He has chosen me to be someone to take chances for him every day.
When I have this perspective, it makes the choices of law school seem very small. It makes the choices and chances of serving other people seem tiny in God's plan. But small is not insignificant. God uses all of these little chances that we take every day for his glory. He uses all the decisions in faith that we make to work as part of his plan. In me, he is working to give confidence in taking chances every day. He asks me every day to take a chance in him. I take a chance, using faith, that he will guide me in a path that will be meaningful for myself, for others, and most of all for his purposes.
God has faith in us, that we will take a chance on him. He hopes that we will trust his plans. There are plans for healing and grace so far beyond what we can ever imagine. These plans use struggles that hurt deeply to make this grace even sweeter.
God has been challenging me to be persistent in restoring broken relationships in my life. There have been many difficult situations of confusion and pain. But as the knower and creator of the big picture, these pieces are part of God's plan when we trust him to use them for His glory. While I so often want to design the process of healing in God's plan, he also challenges me to have faith in his timing and design. Only his ways will bring the most peace.
The things that God has taught me for law school have been shaped by other lessons I have learned. As I trust Him to restore broken areas of my life, I also trust him to provide financially, intellectually, and passionately. I expect only the best and most present help from him as I enter new places in school and career. I trust him to give me the skills I need for success. I trust him to bless the people I work with and advocate for each day. Most of all, i trust him to use me as an instrument of peace in this amazing field of advocacy.
Take a chance. You never know where it will lead you.
Sing as One,
SJC
